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hmcgirl.livejournal.com) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
fellowshippers2004-02-16 05:42 am
The True Kings of Comedy
Billy and Dom need to make a comedy together. A buddy flick. Something like Tommy Boy. Or Road Trip.
Anyhoo, I assembled quotes from the second half of the Two Towers DVD commentary. These two just have me in stitches.
Dom: I heard they designed Gollum’s ears based on mine.
Billy: I started that rumor.
Billy: But you’ve got to remember how he became Gollum.
Dom: And he killed his brother.
Billy: Or was it his cousin?
Dom: Either way, it’s family. I'd kill you though if we were fishing and we found the ring.
Billy: What if it was a pretend ring? Like, from a lucky bag?
Dom: Well, you'd have to swap me some other piece of jewelry, otherwise I'd wring your neck and choke you in the muddy water.
Billy: What if I had sherbert?
Dom: Well, if you had sherbert then we could come to an arrangement.
Dom: Liv Tyler.
Billy: Very beautiful.
Dom: Very. Viggo Mortensen....
Billy: Not quite as beautiful.
Dom: I mean, if I had to choose between kissing either of them I'd pick Liv.
Billy: Me to. Cept if I had an itch. Then Viggo's beardy-beard could scratch it.
Dom: After a while, you just long for Pippin and Merry.
Billy: They’re thinking, “I’m missing something here... I don’t know what I’m missing...”
Dom: “There is a piece of my life, a shard of my heart has been torn out....”
Billy: (crying) “I don’t know where it is!”
Dom: “And I don’t understand where it is.”
Billy: (still crying like a little girl) “Something! And then....” Oh look those two little buggers up a tree! Oh, that’s better, aye?
Dom: Like a new sunrise.
Billy: Ah, like someone’s just given you a cake.
Dom: Tell you what, Sean Astin was fat, wasn’t he? Would you like to make a comment on that Bill? Or would you just like to laugh silently?
Billy: Nope, I will leave that with you, Dom.
Dom: I did say he was fat. He now has the body of a Greek God. Spirrus, the Horse God. (Billy giggling in background)
Dom: That’s David Wenham, playing Faramir. He became affectionately known as Daisy. So if you see him on the street say, “Hello Daisy!” And he will think that you know him.
Billy: He’s gonna hate you for the rest of your life for that.
Dom: Sorry Daisy.
Billy: I’d just like to say how proud I am to be in these movies.
Dom: I’d just like to say how proud I am to be sitting here next to you, Bill.
Billy: You won’t be for long. (long pause) I love you.
Dom: I love you.
Billy: Thanks.
Dom: I think the
Billy: We shall rename it. Because um, I think we spoke about.... (silence) Lost my train of thought. Say something for a minute, Dom.
Dom: I.... really like eggs. In the morning. And bacon at night. Is that wrong?
Billy: No, carry on, carry on.
Dom: Uh.... when I was 7 I used to eat ants---
Billy: Got it! We were talking about um.... (silence) Lost it again!
(Both howl with laughter)
Billy: That’s quite incredible, isn’t it??
(Dom cackles)
Dom: Viggo Mortensen.....
Billy: Mad as a fish.
Dom: Smells a bit.
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Hilarious!
I love how random it is. Love love love.
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r these all or just a few?
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Thank you SO MUCH for posting these. Feels good to laugh.
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Re:
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I love them, they are too funny for words! :D Thanks for posting this!
~Kirsty
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Must... resist... need to do... homework...