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fellowshippers2004-05-24 01:43 am
If I Die (part 9b)
Title: If I Die (Part 9b)
Author: ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif){kind=small}
dani_grl4
Pairing: Dom/Billy
Rating: R
Disclaimer: So glad this isn’t true.
Feedback: Makes the world go ‘round. Love for all the lovely feedback so far.
Warning: Angst, minor hospital squick. However, despite the title, there is no death.
Summary: Nope, can’t give it away.
A/N: I cannot express how much I wanted to give up on this fic but my charming beta, canciona just wouldn’t let me. Much love and hugs to you, dear. I apologise for the lateness of this chapter. I could give you a list of excuses but you probably just want to read the bloody thing, eh?
Prologue, Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8
“Let’s go sit down.” He leads Dom to an empty corner in the waiting room. He can see Orli on the other side, looking at him questioningly, and Sean talking on his cell phone, despite the sign over his head with a cell phone and a huge red circle with a line through it.
“You want to talk to me?”
“I want to know what happened to Billy. Tell me everything and start by telling me how the sons of bitches who took him are going to be rotting behind bars.”
“That they are, Dom. Kidnapping, attempted murder if we’re lucky. There were two men and a woman. Fairly well-known drug dealers. Probably got in over their heads with plans to make some fast money. Didn’t expect the media attention that comes with kidnapping a movie star. Idiots, really, but dangerous ones.”
“Why Billy?”
“We don’t know all the details yet, Dom. Looks like it was pretty random. We do know that the woman was trying to help Billy to escape. Doesn’t look like she was in on the kidnapping really. She’s actually in the ICU right now, fighting for her life. Got beat up pretty bad as well when she was caught helping Billy, we think. He’s pretty lucky considering. One of the men we arrested is suspected in the murder of another man recently. Billy will have to give a more detailed statement when he’s up to it but he was able to tell us a bit in the ambulance. Well, when he wasn’t busy talking about you, that is,” the detective gives Dom an encouraging smile and places a hand heavily on his shoulder. “He can’t wait to see you.”
“Yeah,” is all Dom can manage, his mind trying to process the scenario Detective McNamara has laid out for him. Murderer. ICU. The enormity of what’s happened crashes down on Dom as he realises that he came so very close to losing his Billy, his love, forever.
“Billy was pissed off at me that night, you know? I never told anyone that. I was being quite cheeky with some fans. H-he came back from a job in Scotland early and I was ignoring him. He stormed off to the loo and that’s when…” his voice trails off for a minute while he composes himself. Detective McNamara just listens quietly. “I wanted to make him jealous. I wanted him to feel guilty for fucking doing what he loves. For getting a part that was so good for his career, just because it was far away from me. God, I’m such a selfish bastard!” Dom puts his hands in his head once more, disgusted with himself so much he can’t bear to look at the detective anymore.
“Dom, do you think you could have stopped this from happening somehow?” Dom nods, still covering his face.
“Dominic, look at me.” Dom reluctantly lifts his head, a look of raw torment on his face. “This is absolutely no one’s fault but those sick criminals, probably so high on drugs that night they couldn’t think straight. There’s nothing you could have done to stop it, do you get that?”
Dom just stares ahead.
“What if they had taken you instead?”
He turns to face the detective, a look of relief on his face almost as though this is the punishment he’s been waiting for someone to offer him. “In a second. I’d trade places with him in a second.”
“And you would want him to go through what you’re going through now? To feel what you’re feeling? Think about it. He’s not the only one who’s suffered here, Dom. After listening to some of the things you just said, I don’t know that you got the better deal in all this.”
Dom has no answer for this. “I need to see him,” he says finally.
************************************************************
Elijah peers into the room. His hands are a little sweaty with anticipation of how Billy will have changed after all this time. He stands quietly in the doorway watching Margaret talking softly and holding on to Billy’s hand. They both look as though they’ve been crying. Billy looks as though every inch of skin is either swollen or bruised but he’s alive and Elijah doesn’t know whether to laugh or cry. He decides on a mixture of both.
Billy notices Elijah standing in the doorway and smiles weakly at him. Elijah stands there, rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet, trying to suppress a grin he can’t contain at the hint of Billy’s charming smile. Billy finally motions for him to come over and Elijah hurries forward and gently kisses him all over his forehead, anywhere that’s not obviously wounded.
“Oi, with the slobbering, Lij!” Billy winces in pain but is delighted all the same.
“Sorry, man. It’s so good to see you Billy, God I’ve missed you so much. We’ve been so worried and-”
“Slow down Elijah, take it easy.” Billy’s relieved to see he hasn’t changed one bit.
“How are you feeling, Billy? You look like shit.”
“Well thank you, Lij, I feel like shite. Actually I feel great, you know? Really, really glad to see you. So, uh, where’s Dom?” He has difficulty talking with his swollen lip.
Elijah clears his throat. “Oh, um, he’s here but he wanted to talk to one of the detectives for a bit. He’ll be right in.” He’s terrible at lying and he hopes that the last bit is true and that Dom is indeed about to get his ass in here.
“Okay, then,” Billy says, quietly. “Margaret tells me you took good care of Dom while I was gone. I want to thank you.”
You haven’t seen the state of him, Elijah thinks. “Of course, Billy. That’s what brothers are for.”
“How is he? Margaret here says he’s fine, but I know when she’s lying.”
“I don’t think you understand what a scare you gave us there, Billy,” Margaret says.
Elijah wonders if he can be honest and lie at the same time. “Oh, well you know…he’s in one piece, Bill. Mostly.”
Before Billy could inquire further about Dom there was a knock at the door. His heart sank at the sight of nurse. Dom still hadn’t come in. Where is he?
“Mr. Boyd, we need to take you down to X-ray now.”
“We’ll be right outside, love.” Margaret leans down and kisses Billy softly on his head.
“Later, Bill.” Elijah smiles.
“Elijah?”
“Yeah, Billy?”
“Tell Dom to stop avoiding me, and that I love him.”
Elijah nods. “Right.”
************************************************************
“Dom?”
Dom looks up from his conversation with Detective McNamara. “Lij, how is he?”
“Well, he’s asking for you.”
“I know, I was just going to go in there,” Dom says as he stands.
Elijah puts a hand on his arm. “Well you can’t now, they’ve taken him to run some tests.”
Dom looks positively crestfallen. “Oh.”
“Why didn’t you go in there, Dommie? He wanted to see you.”
“You wouldn’t understand. Just leave me alone for a minute, yeah?” Dom says, more disgusted with himself than angry at Elijah.
“No, I most certainly will not leave you alone.” Elijah says calmly. “Dom, he doesn’t look great but he’s still Billy. Still intuitive as fuck. Knew you were out here avoiding him. Wanted me to tell you to stop and also that he loves you.”
Dom smiles slightly at the thought of Billy knowing him well enough to know exactly what he’s doing, even after being apart for so long. Then he thinks about what Elijah says about Billy loving him, a thought that simultaneously fills him with happiness and guilt.
Elijah sees that look on Dom’s face he’s seen a thousand times recently. A look that says he’s about to fall apart. Even after two months of seeing this look, it still never fails to break Elijah’s heart.
“C’mere.” He gathers Dom into a gentle hug. “Poor Sblomie. This isn’t over for you, is it? I just thought we’d get Billy back and things will be fine. But they’re not fine, are they? And they’re not going to be for a long time, for you or for him. But he loves you, Dom. He always has, he always will.”
He lets Elijah hold him, tries to accept the words he’s telling him.
************************************************************
Dom finally goes over to sit with Orli and Sean. They exchange hugs and words of relief as they wait for Billy to get back to his room.
“Dominic?”
Dom looks up to face Billy’s sister. “Oh, Margaret.” They hug each other tightly. “How is he?”
The tears in her eyes scare Dom. Maybe Billy isn’t doing as well as everyone keeps assuring him. “He looks terrible, but I’ve not seen him so happy. And that was when he was talking about seeing you again.” She smiles at Dom and he finally exhales the breath he’d been holding in.
“He’s waiting to see you, Dom, and he’s been waiting for so long. Don’t make him suffer much longer.”
“No, Margaret. I won’t. I promise.”
************************************************************
The next hour passes by too slowly for Dom’s liking. He’s anxious to see Billy for himself, to make sure he’s okay, whether Billy’s angry with him or not, he doesn’t care right now. He will make Billy understand that he never meant to hurt him that night. He would never flirt meaningfully with anyone, ever. Not like he does with him. Never like he does with Billy.
Viggo and Liv show up while they wait. Margaret holds onto Dom’s hand because he’s shaking. When Dom thinks he might scream with frustration, a doctor appears.
“I’m sorry but he’s asleep now. We’ve given him something for the pain so he probably won’t wake until morning. One of you can go in there and be with him for a while, but he needs his rest.”
Everyone looks at Dom. “Right, then.” He takes a deep breath and stands. Dom realises the doctor is trying to tell them about Billy’s condition but he doesn’t hear anything, all thoughts focused on just seeing him.
The doctor leads him to the door and Dom walks in, left on his own. There’s a faint light over Billy’s bed that allows him just enough illumination to see his face. Even with the livid purple bruises, Dom can still make out the gorgeous features that make his heart stop. A stabbing pain pierces his chest as he takes inventory of all of Billy’s injuries. There’s a white bandage on the side of his head where he assumes Billy has stitches. He can see a little bit of blood seeping through the bandage. His left arm is in a hard cast and a sling, his other hand at his side supporting an I.V. with even more bruising along his arm. There’s a large cut on Billy’s beautiful mouth, held together by more stitches.
Silent tears stream down Dom’s face as he sits in the chair next to Billy’s bed. He carefully lifts the hand with the tube in it and places it in his own.
“Hi, Billy. It’s me, love,” he whispers as he looks intently at Billy’s face as though he can hear him. Dom carefully lifts each of Billy’s fingers to his mouth and gently kisses them, one at a time. He places Billy’s hand back down by his side and rests his head on the side of the bed, falling asleep almost instantly.
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