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fellowshippers2004-05-22 02:42 am
flumsan.livejournal.com) wrote in fellowshippers2004-05-22 02:42 am
"Stay" DM/BB
Title: "Stay"
Pairing: BB/DM
Summary: "’Walking wounded’ again, Dom?"
Feedback: Is muse food. Please? It's very much appriciated. :)
Disclaimer: Not true. Fiction. Look it up.
AN: Angst. Thanks to Ree for the great beta and also thanks to Asleia for helping me out when I was stuck. Love you guys. And this is for Lauren to make her feel better. <3
The door was unlocked, and Billy stepped right in. He kicked off his shoes and tiptoed towards the living room. And instantly he was struck by how beautiful Dom was. Billy looked at him for a moment before stepping inside of the room. Dom was sitting on the corner of the couch, the windows beside him were thrown open, the sun outside slowly setting, colouring the room. In his left hand he held a small, pink bottle. He held his right hand a few inches from his mouth, which formed a silent 'o' as he blew soft soap bubbles out through the window. The sun and the sky made them glisten in red, pink and orange before they either burst or disappeared out of sight.
Billy softly greeted him before sinking down on the soft cushions next to him. He couldn’t help but feel sad. It was clear that Dom wasn’t feeling very well. Billy looked at his hands and cringed as he saw what Dom had written on them.
"'Walking wounded' again, Dom?"
It got silent, but not an uncomfortable silence, words just felt unnecessary. The single look Dom had given him said more then words ever could. The only sounds were their soft breathing and the occasional clunking when Dom showed the stick into the small bottle.
"I need closeness," he suddenly said. "I miss having someone to hold. I want someone to stay."
The lump in Billy’s throat grew.
"You know I don’t have any good advice for you, don’t you, Dom? Why you’re not hooked up with someone yet is still a mystery to me. Too picky, perhaps?"
Dom laughed a little, a laughter filled with sadness. "I want it to feel right. It never does."
He settled down on the couch, setting the bubbles aside. The sweet scent of soap that still lingered in the room was replaced by Dom’s as he moved close to Billy, leaning his head on Billy’s shoulder. A shiver went down his spine when he felt Dom's heated arm pressed up against him.
"Except when I’m with you."
*
Billy had never been afraid of the dark. But later that night when he was lying in his bed, with the lights off, all he did was feel uncomfortable. He usually felt calm and peaceful, now this slight feeling of nagging confusion was surrounding him. Dom’s words kept ringing in his ears and he didn’t know how to interpret them.
Tossing and turning wasn’t helping so he got up and walked to the kitchen, the floor cold under his feet. He sat down at the table; the sound of the chair scraping against the floor was the only thing that was heard in the otherwise quiet apartment. He felt restless, anxious and the room suddenly felt smaller.
"Argh!"
He slammed his fist down on the table, making a loud noise and realised that he’d probably just woken Dom. Sure enough, a few seconds later Dom entered the kitchen. He looked like shit; his eyes were rimmed with red and his hair was a complete mess.
"You okay there, Bill?"
"Can’t sleep."
"Me neither. Eh, wanna go outside or something?"
Billy had no idea where Dom was planning on taking him but quickly nodded. Anything would be better than the suffocating apartment. A few minutes later, they were walking down the quiet road from Dom’s apartment building. He was humming softly, something he did often.
"Heard anything from Ali lately?"
"Last time we spoke she was in Mexico. Or she sent me a postcard actually."
"So everything worked out fine for her? She’s happy?"
"Yeah. I hope so."
They left the subject at that. It had been a while now; Billy had no need to talk about it anymore. He and Ali had decided they were better off as friends, and after going through a few lonely nights, filled with doubt and confusion, things in his life had turned back to normal, the way they were before meeting her.
Billy was lost in thoughts and memories for a minute, and when he looked up he was walking in what seemed to be a big garden.
"What’s this, mate?"
"Just… My thinking place."
Something in Dom’s voice told Billy that he had no desire to explain any further, and Billy really didn’t mind. It was beautiful, and it didn’t feel like they were in Los Angeles any longer. They settled down next to each other on the damp grass. Billy looked up at the stars for a second, and then he glanced at Dom. He seemed older. The wrinkles in his face were showing off a bit more when he was tired. Dom was looking down on the grass, found a flower and picked it up.
"He loves me, he loves me not. He loves me, he loves me not. He loves me, he loves me not…"
He slowly chanted the childish verse as he picked the small petals, letting them fall to the ground with help from the soft breeze.
"…He loves me not."
The last petal fell to the ground, and after that the rest of the flower. Dom finally looked at him, asking a question without using words.
"He loves him."
Billy was surprised with how steady his voice sounded. He was moved by Dom’s way of showing affection, and raised an unsteady hand to brush Dom’s hair out of his eyes.
He couldn’t remember who moved in first, Dom or himself, but when their lips met it was the most overwhelming feeling he had ever felt. He had no memory of how they had gotten home either; most of the night seemed to be a mixture of pleasure and love, with a touch of innocence and confusion.
*
"What are we?"
It was an honest, direct question but Billy wasn’t exactly sure what Dom was talking about.
"You and me. What are we now? Are we something?"
Billy propped up his elbow and rested his head on the palm of his hand, looking at Dominic who was resting next to him. He traced Dom’s nose with his finger, enjoying the feeling of the soft skin beneath.
"Is this just something temporary?"
Dom’s question was now nearly inaudible but Billy was so close that he could hear it even though it was nothing more than a mere whisper. He rolled over onto his back and stared at the ceiling for a while; just admiring the 'glow in the dark'-stars that Dom had spent hours fastening one night, a long time ago.
A nod, he nodded, more of a fraction of a movement actually, but Dom’s expression immediately changed from relaxed into perplexed. He hesitated for a moment, as if he wasn’t sure of what to do, and then freed himself from the covers, quickly moving away from the bed.
His skin was pale in the surreal, almost fake light that shone through the windows. He found his jeans, stepped into them, and grabbed his brightly coloured cell. Not once did he even look back at Billy, he just exited the room.
As soon as Billy had actually nodded, he regretted it. His heart was pumping faster by every beat now and he closed his eyes, expecting to see darkness. But all he saw was Dom.
When Billy got out in the hallway he found Dom fighting to get his jacket on properly. Billy walked up behind him, softly saying his name.
"Dom…"
Dom froze; his arm missed the sleeve and hung loosely at his side instead.
Billy slid his arms around Dom’s body, pressing his naked skin against denim and synthetic fabric. He stood on his toes, glad that he had Dom to lean on.
"To have Dom to lean on…" Yeah, he liked the sound of that. Suddenly his head felt clear, refreshed, like after a sudden rainstorm in a hot, sticky day or a fresh breeze on the sea. His hands found their way down Dom’s body, making contact with his skin between the waistline of his jeans and the too short jacket that Dom insisted on wearing.
Dom’s hair tickled under his fingers and he felt the goosebumps appear on Dom’s bare skin.
He rested his chin on Dom’s shoulder, inhaling the familiar scent again.
"Stay."
x-posted everywhere.
Pairing: BB/DM
Summary: "’Walking wounded’ again, Dom?"
Feedback: Is muse food. Please? It's very much appriciated. :)
Disclaimer: Not true. Fiction. Look it up.
AN: Angst. Thanks to Ree for the great beta and also thanks to Asleia for helping me out when I was stuck. Love you guys. And this is for Lauren to make her feel better. <3
The door was unlocked, and Billy stepped right in. He kicked off his shoes and tiptoed towards the living room. And instantly he was struck by how beautiful Dom was. Billy looked at him for a moment before stepping inside of the room. Dom was sitting on the corner of the couch, the windows beside him were thrown open, the sun outside slowly setting, colouring the room. In his left hand he held a small, pink bottle. He held his right hand a few inches from his mouth, which formed a silent 'o' as he blew soft soap bubbles out through the window. The sun and the sky made them glisten in red, pink and orange before they either burst or disappeared out of sight.
Billy softly greeted him before sinking down on the soft cushions next to him. He couldn’t help but feel sad. It was clear that Dom wasn’t feeling very well. Billy looked at his hands and cringed as he saw what Dom had written on them.
"'Walking wounded' again, Dom?"
It got silent, but not an uncomfortable silence, words just felt unnecessary. The single look Dom had given him said more then words ever could. The only sounds were their soft breathing and the occasional clunking when Dom showed the stick into the small bottle.
"I need closeness," he suddenly said. "I miss having someone to hold. I want someone to stay."
The lump in Billy’s throat grew.
"You know I don’t have any good advice for you, don’t you, Dom? Why you’re not hooked up with someone yet is still a mystery to me. Too picky, perhaps?"
Dom laughed a little, a laughter filled with sadness. "I want it to feel right. It never does."
He settled down on the couch, setting the bubbles aside. The sweet scent of soap that still lingered in the room was replaced by Dom’s as he moved close to Billy, leaning his head on Billy’s shoulder. A shiver went down his spine when he felt Dom's heated arm pressed up against him.
"Except when I’m with you."
*
Billy had never been afraid of the dark. But later that night when he was lying in his bed, with the lights off, all he did was feel uncomfortable. He usually felt calm and peaceful, now this slight feeling of nagging confusion was surrounding him. Dom’s words kept ringing in his ears and he didn’t know how to interpret them.
Tossing and turning wasn’t helping so he got up and walked to the kitchen, the floor cold under his feet. He sat down at the table; the sound of the chair scraping against the floor was the only thing that was heard in the otherwise quiet apartment. He felt restless, anxious and the room suddenly felt smaller.
"Argh!"
He slammed his fist down on the table, making a loud noise and realised that he’d probably just woken Dom. Sure enough, a few seconds later Dom entered the kitchen. He looked like shit; his eyes were rimmed with red and his hair was a complete mess.
"You okay there, Bill?"
"Can’t sleep."
"Me neither. Eh, wanna go outside or something?"
Billy had no idea where Dom was planning on taking him but quickly nodded. Anything would be better than the suffocating apartment. A few minutes later, they were walking down the quiet road from Dom’s apartment building. He was humming softly, something he did often.
"Heard anything from Ali lately?"
"Last time we spoke she was in Mexico. Or she sent me a postcard actually."
"So everything worked out fine for her? She’s happy?"
"Yeah. I hope so."
They left the subject at that. It had been a while now; Billy had no need to talk about it anymore. He and Ali had decided they were better off as friends, and after going through a few lonely nights, filled with doubt and confusion, things in his life had turned back to normal, the way they were before meeting her.
Billy was lost in thoughts and memories for a minute, and when he looked up he was walking in what seemed to be a big garden.
"What’s this, mate?"
"Just… My thinking place."
Something in Dom’s voice told Billy that he had no desire to explain any further, and Billy really didn’t mind. It was beautiful, and it didn’t feel like they were in Los Angeles any longer. They settled down next to each other on the damp grass. Billy looked up at the stars for a second, and then he glanced at Dom. He seemed older. The wrinkles in his face were showing off a bit more when he was tired. Dom was looking down on the grass, found a flower and picked it up.
"He loves me, he loves me not. He loves me, he loves me not. He loves me, he loves me not…"
He slowly chanted the childish verse as he picked the small petals, letting them fall to the ground with help from the soft breeze.
"…He loves me not."
The last petal fell to the ground, and after that the rest of the flower. Dom finally looked at him, asking a question without using words.
"He loves him."
Billy was surprised with how steady his voice sounded. He was moved by Dom’s way of showing affection, and raised an unsteady hand to brush Dom’s hair out of his eyes.
He couldn’t remember who moved in first, Dom or himself, but when their lips met it was the most overwhelming feeling he had ever felt. He had no memory of how they had gotten home either; most of the night seemed to be a mixture of pleasure and love, with a touch of innocence and confusion.
*
"What are we?"
It was an honest, direct question but Billy wasn’t exactly sure what Dom was talking about.
"You and me. What are we now? Are we something?"
Billy propped up his elbow and rested his head on the palm of his hand, looking at Dominic who was resting next to him. He traced Dom’s nose with his finger, enjoying the feeling of the soft skin beneath.
"Is this just something temporary?"
Dom’s question was now nearly inaudible but Billy was so close that he could hear it even though it was nothing more than a mere whisper. He rolled over onto his back and stared at the ceiling for a while; just admiring the 'glow in the dark'-stars that Dom had spent hours fastening one night, a long time ago.
A nod, he nodded, more of a fraction of a movement actually, but Dom’s expression immediately changed from relaxed into perplexed. He hesitated for a moment, as if he wasn’t sure of what to do, and then freed himself from the covers, quickly moving away from the bed.
His skin was pale in the surreal, almost fake light that shone through the windows. He found his jeans, stepped into them, and grabbed his brightly coloured cell. Not once did he even look back at Billy, he just exited the room.
As soon as Billy had actually nodded, he regretted it. His heart was pumping faster by every beat now and he closed his eyes, expecting to see darkness. But all he saw was Dom.
When Billy got out in the hallway he found Dom fighting to get his jacket on properly. Billy walked up behind him, softly saying his name.
"Dom…"
Dom froze; his arm missed the sleeve and hung loosely at his side instead.
Billy slid his arms around Dom’s body, pressing his naked skin against denim and synthetic fabric. He stood on his toes, glad that he had Dom to lean on.
"To have Dom to lean on…" Yeah, he liked the sound of that. Suddenly his head felt clear, refreshed, like after a sudden rainstorm in a hot, sticky day or a fresh breeze on the sea. His hands found their way down Dom’s body, making contact with his skin between the waistline of his jeans and the too short jacket that Dom insisted on wearing.
Dom’s hair tickled under his fingers and he felt the goosebumps appear on Dom’s bare skin.
He rested his chin on Dom’s shoulder, inhaling the familiar scent again.
"Stay."
x-posted everywhere.
no subject
*gives you big squishy hug*
no subject
Ohh, a hug! *cuddles you*