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fellowshippers2005-12-17 09:04 am
geniusartist.livejournal.com) wrote in fellowshippers2005-12-17 09:04 am
Journal Keeping (8)
Title: Journal Keeping (8)
Fandom: LOTR RPS
Pairing: EW/DM
Rating: PG-13
Author's Notes: Deals with sensitive issues. Nothing graphic.
Summary: Elijah's therapist instructs him to keep a journal. Nightmares, train rides, a forgotten traumatic event and one Dominic Monaghan are the subjects of his entries.
9.2.04
If you could label anyone in a relationship (with me) the “faithful one”, yours truly would be it.
Even with Dom.
His past indiscretions will be topics of discussion for another day... To his credit, there weren’t many. Enough, though, to keep things, er, exciting? Well, about as exciting as anticipating -- and then getting -- an ice pick in the eye every so often.
Our most recent break was some months ago.
Her name was (is) Evangeline Lilly.
I learned after the first two -- a boy, then a girl -- that in as much as I could place blame their way, even if they had some notion of me, ultimately it was Dom who committed the infidelities.
The cheater.
Before Evangeline, I’d made it perfectly clear. Do it again, and that’s it. Contrary to popular opinion -- and mischaracterization, at that -- I will not follow anyone, I repeat, anyone, to the ends of Mordor. Even if I do look cute doing it.
So when Dom first started feeling “attracted” to his LOST co-star, he was wise enough to be upfront about it. So I did what any loving, weary-from-life, self-scandalized boyfriend would do.
I gave him permission.
With clear contractual terms of course.
Go. I’ll consider us “separated” in the meanwhile. If you do anything with her, any forthcoming guilt on your part will be entirely your responsibility. I am much too consumed with recent unravelings in my life that have nothing to do with you. And don’t even have the nerve to look hurt by that statement. If you come back, (and I didn’t say this aloud although I thought it in small print -- and you will, as you always have before) I will give you another chance. But it will be your last. Next time you have any inkling towards being with another person, I will let you go. But you will be forbidden to return. In every way.
As predicted -- although don’t be fooled by my now nonchalance, because I spent many a sleepless night wishing I could take back my bravado reaction, which in retrospect distracted the nightmares for a bit so perhaps it wasn’t all bad -- Dom did come back. He called after just getting home from their one date.
I don’t want to be with anyone but you.
You’ve said that before...
I know.
This is your last chance.
And mine.
It hasn’t been that long since. Some months ago, as I said. But I don’t think he’s going anywhere again. And it may just be temporary certainty.
But there are things in life we can always count on.
Like the sun will always rise east.
Or that winter turns to spring.
And that if you spit a piece of chewed gum on the sidewalk, you will inevitably end up stepping on another’s throwaway and fuck me if I end up complaining about it.
And, well.
...That Dom loves me.
Fandom: LOTR RPS
Pairing: EW/DM
Rating: PG-13
Author's Notes: Deals with sensitive issues. Nothing graphic.
Summary: Elijah's therapist instructs him to keep a journal. Nightmares, train rides, a forgotten traumatic event and one Dominic Monaghan are the subjects of his entries.
9.2.04
If you could label anyone in a relationship (with me) the “faithful one”, yours truly would be it.
Even with Dom.
His past indiscretions will be topics of discussion for another day... To his credit, there weren’t many. Enough, though, to keep things, er, exciting? Well, about as exciting as anticipating -- and then getting -- an ice pick in the eye every so often.
Our most recent break was some months ago.
Her name was (is) Evangeline Lilly.
I learned after the first two -- a boy, then a girl -- that in as much as I could place blame their way, even if they had some notion of me, ultimately it was Dom who committed the infidelities.
The cheater.
Before Evangeline, I’d made it perfectly clear. Do it again, and that’s it. Contrary to popular opinion -- and mischaracterization, at that -- I will not follow anyone, I repeat, anyone, to the ends of Mordor. Even if I do look cute doing it.
So when Dom first started feeling “attracted” to his LOST co-star, he was wise enough to be upfront about it. So I did what any loving, weary-from-life, self-scandalized boyfriend would do.
I gave him permission.
With clear contractual terms of course.
Go. I’ll consider us “separated” in the meanwhile. If you do anything with her, any forthcoming guilt on your part will be entirely your responsibility. I am much too consumed with recent unravelings in my life that have nothing to do with you. And don’t even have the nerve to look hurt by that statement. If you come back, (and I didn’t say this aloud although I thought it in small print -- and you will, as you always have before) I will give you another chance. But it will be your last. Next time you have any inkling towards being with another person, I will let you go. But you will be forbidden to return. In every way.
As predicted -- although don’t be fooled by my now nonchalance, because I spent many a sleepless night wishing I could take back my bravado reaction, which in retrospect distracted the nightmares for a bit so perhaps it wasn’t all bad -- Dom did come back. He called after just getting home from their one date.
I don’t want to be with anyone but you.
You’ve said that before...
I know.
This is your last chance.
And mine.
It hasn’t been that long since. Some months ago, as I said. But I don’t think he’s going anywhere again. And it may just be temporary certainty.
But there are things in life we can always count on.
Like the sun will always rise east.
Or that winter turns to spring.
And that if you spit a piece of chewed gum on the sidewalk, you will inevitably end up stepping on another’s throwaway and fuck me if I end up complaining about it.
And, well.
...That Dom loves me.
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So sweet of you, thank you!
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I just wanted to let you know -- I won't be updating here anymore. But if you want, I can friend you into my LJ and you can read the other parts there. There are currently 24 parts up.
Thanks.
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Enjoy!