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fellowshippers2004-11-03 10:42 pm
rosemending.livejournal.com) wrote in fellowshippers2004-11-03 10:42 pm
Drabbles
My delayed response to Sophrosyne's first line challenge. Four drabbles, all 100 words, all extremely offensive. So you are warned.
The links are the first lines used:-
The first time Dom has sex with Orlando, he breaks out in hives.
Dom's crotch tingle with crabs and he is feverish with the clap. Dom's heart palpitates from the poison. Dom's brain is afire with syphilis. Orlando has given Dom the black plague. Dom feels ravaged by viruses.
Though Orlando remains unawares, Dom was cancerous and addicted. Dom's lungs are paralyzed and his higher brain paraplegic. Dom's immune system has collapsed, under the onslaught of Orlando's girly mouth and manly dick. Dom is infested with Orlando's germs, swimming in mouthfuls of saliva.
The disease ate Dom up, excreting love.
* * * *
Billy likes fucking Elijah when he has a fever. Because Elijah is delirious and defenseless and weeps when he realises.
Billy fucks Elijah and measures his temperature, with cock dipped into Elijah's anus. Did I say dipped, I meant, stabbed.
And Billy puts his hand on Elijah's forehead, to pry his head back, so that Elijah sees, arching impossibly, Billy forcing genitals and fingers into his arse.
And Elijah shouts, to wake himself, from fever dreams, from unfeasible abuse. Till sweat and semen cools him down again.
Billy likes fucking Elijah when he has a fever. Because Elijah never remembers.
* * * *
Dom was looking around for someone to shag. When Orlando's dog wandered into Dom's hotel room. Dom took out an ice cream. Dom offered the dog the ice cream and she licked off the chocolate top with much enthusiasm. Dom watched her hot tongue melt the vanilla ice cream, her muzzle dripping with the sweet treat. Dom patted her head and spoke to her gently.
"I don't know about you, but I'm finding it awfully lonely here in New Zealand," Dom gave her his best puppy eyes.
The dog winked and came forward.
"Oi!" Orlando said, when he came in.
* * * *
The way Dom remembers it, Billy's eyes had been liquid with love, and he'd tasted like metal and lust, and he'd watched Dom laying palm-prints all over his body with his mouth open, he was breathing so hard.
Billy swallowed his own tongue.
Dom tried to retrieve it, by sucking it out. But Dom did not manage to do so, before Billy asphyxiated. To death.
Dom panicked. Dom dressed Billy and drove him to the dump. Dom kissed Billy goodbye and left him in the compost heap.
But the police came nonetheless, because Dom's palm-prints were all over Billy's body.
AIDS, non-con, dog, corpse.
The links are the first lines used:-
The first time Dom has sex with Orlando, he breaks out in hives.
Dom's crotch tingle with crabs and he is feverish with the clap. Dom's heart palpitates from the poison. Dom's brain is afire with syphilis. Orlando has given Dom the black plague. Dom feels ravaged by viruses.
Though Orlando remains unawares, Dom was cancerous and addicted. Dom's lungs are paralyzed and his higher brain paraplegic. Dom's immune system has collapsed, under the onslaught of Orlando's girly mouth and manly dick. Dom is infested with Orlando's germs, swimming in mouthfuls of saliva.
The disease ate Dom up, excreting love.
* * * *
Billy likes fucking Elijah when he has a fever. Because Elijah is delirious and defenseless and weeps when he realises.
Billy fucks Elijah and measures his temperature, with cock dipped into Elijah's anus. Did I say dipped, I meant, stabbed.
And Billy puts his hand on Elijah's forehead, to pry his head back, so that Elijah sees, arching impossibly, Billy forcing genitals and fingers into his arse.
And Elijah shouts, to wake himself, from fever dreams, from unfeasible abuse. Till sweat and semen cools him down again.
Billy likes fucking Elijah when he has a fever. Because Elijah never remembers.
* * * *
Dom was looking around for someone to shag. When Orlando's dog wandered into Dom's hotel room. Dom took out an ice cream. Dom offered the dog the ice cream and she licked off the chocolate top with much enthusiasm. Dom watched her hot tongue melt the vanilla ice cream, her muzzle dripping with the sweet treat. Dom patted her head and spoke to her gently.
"I don't know about you, but I'm finding it awfully lonely here in New Zealand," Dom gave her his best puppy eyes.
The dog winked and came forward.
"Oi!" Orlando said, when he came in.
* * * *
The way Dom remembers it, Billy's eyes had been liquid with love, and he'd tasted like metal and lust, and he'd watched Dom laying palm-prints all over his body with his mouth open, he was breathing so hard.
Billy swallowed his own tongue.
Dom tried to retrieve it, by sucking it out. But Dom did not manage to do so, before Billy asphyxiated. To death.
Dom panicked. Dom dressed Billy and drove him to the dump. Dom kissed Billy goodbye and left him in the compost heap.
But the police came nonetheless, because Dom's palm-prints were all over Billy's body.
AIDS, non-con, dog, corpse.
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BRAVO! =D =D =D
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Why did you write this? Why? Why?
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However, maybe a more specific warning?
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Okay.
AIDS, non-con, dog, corpse.
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I guess I just want you to know that I wasn't particularly offended, there's just some things I tend to avoid in the fanfiction world.
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AIDS, non-con, dog, corpse.
Well...that *warning* made me laugh. It's so bloody...caustic...which is an adjective I'd use for your writing, too, at least for what little of your writing I have been exposed to so far.
But I am missing the point...which is...if you really want to know...that I am amazed at how some privileged and gifted writers manage to master eloquence through mastery of a serious lack of words. To make it clearer...you didn't just write four drabbles (with a seriously small amount of words), you wrote four worlds (through the said small amount of words, which in itself is impressive)...and what's more, your four lovely, yet disturbing worlds are complete and absofuckinglutely ALIVE! All that in a couple of sentences...and it pisses me off, because I like it and I wish I could do it...and can't...
And I might try to be more articulate than that, but it's beyond my abilities ;-)
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