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fellowshippers2004-07-29 08:11 am
woodcliff.livejournal.com) wrote in fellowshippers2004-07-29 08:11 am
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Title: Sushi
Author: Eliyah
Pairing: DM/EW
Rating: NC-17
Category: Horror
Warning: Blood and guts and totally untrue
Disclaimer: Although I have never met Dom, I am sure he prefers chicken. Other wild fictional things hereunder.
Summary: A different take on the plot where Dom asks Elijah on a date and Dom eats Sushi and everyone knows Dom's in love and sets them up but Elijah is too scared to reciprocate.
Dom waivers, stuck between one desire and another.
There was a boy called Elijah whom Dom quite fancied.
When Dom's eyes were fixed on Elijah, Dom's mouth watered. Elijah was a waif of a boy with eyes that swallowed you whole.
Dom wants to feed Elijah supper. And have Elijah for afters.
Quiet like, Dom checked out recipes.
Everyone thought it was nice, how Dom collected cooking videos.
Orlando came and watched Saturday Kitchen with Dom.
They watched a piece of trussed up venison being dressed and sealed.
"I wonder if Elijah likes wild mushroom and thyme sauce?" Dom asked.
Orlando gave Dom an indulgent smile and nodded firmly.
Viggo visited during The Naked Chef.
Dom and Viggo had a beer and observed Jamie Oliver make a leg of lamb.
"Do you think Elijah likes mint stuffing?" Dom speculated.
Viggo gave Dom a knowing look and a grin.
It was Bean who gave Dom the idea.
"The secret to seduction," Bean gazed down his big nose at Dom. "Is a nice meal. Why don't you try seafood, they have aphrodisiac qualities."
When all was ready, Dom invited Elijah over to his flat for an intimate dinner.
"I don't know," Elijah said. "Dom's a bit creepy. He looks at me with hungry eyes."
Everyone laughed at Elijah's innocence.
"No really," Elijah insisted. "Dom might eat me."
"That, Lij, is exactly the point," Viggo and Orlando and Bean chuckled.
Viggo made a vulgar face with his mouth.
Bean jerked his fist meaningfully.
Orlando pushed Elijah out the door.
Elijah went to Dom's and Dom was waiting.
Dom had been expecting Elijah.
There were candles and cutlery.
Elijah sat down in front of the dinner table. A scowl on his face.
Dom gave Elijah a hot towel to wipe his hands.
Elijah smoked to calm his nerves.
Dom prepared the side dishes.
Dom gets a whiff of Elijah's fags. Elijah was chain smoking like a chimney. Dom was sure Elijah was salty and smoky and carcinogenic to taste.
Dom served Elijah seafood.
Oysters plump and wriggling in their shells. Salmon roe piled on bleeding tuna. Clams raw and red. Mackerels with heads and intact eyes. Garnished with lemons.
Elijah blanched.
"You are what you eat," Dom explained. "You'll be fat as an oyster, tender as salmon, shiny as tuna, hard as a clam and pretty as a mackerel."
"I don't care. I won't eat any of these," Elijah takes up his fag. "It's utterly gross, no offense."
"Prawn cocktail?" Dom proffered.
Elijah ashed his cigarette in it.
The prawn cocktail like a juicy green tiger prawn in it. Sat on a bed of salmon mousse. Stacked over the marrow of coral and dressed with the bile of monk fish. Dom had even put a slice of cucumber impaled on a swordfish's mouth, as decoration.
"Sushi is an art form," muttered Dom darkly.
"What's so great about being chopped into pieces and eaten with wasabi?" Elijah retorted.
Dom raised his knife.
When the police found Dom, all the soy sauce was already used up.
The end.
Author: Eliyah
Pairing: DM/EW
Rating: NC-17
Category: Horror
Warning: Blood and guts and totally untrue
Disclaimer: Although I have never met Dom, I am sure he prefers chicken. Other wild fictional things hereunder.
Summary: A different take on the plot where Dom asks Elijah on a date and Dom eats Sushi and everyone knows Dom's in love and sets them up but Elijah is too scared to reciprocate.
Dom waivers, stuck between one desire and another.
There was a boy called Elijah whom Dom quite fancied.
When Dom's eyes were fixed on Elijah, Dom's mouth watered. Elijah was a waif of a boy with eyes that swallowed you whole.
Dom wants to feed Elijah supper. And have Elijah for afters.
Quiet like, Dom checked out recipes.
Everyone thought it was nice, how Dom collected cooking videos.
Orlando came and watched Saturday Kitchen with Dom.
They watched a piece of trussed up venison being dressed and sealed.
"I wonder if Elijah likes wild mushroom and thyme sauce?" Dom asked.
Orlando gave Dom an indulgent smile and nodded firmly.
Viggo visited during The Naked Chef.
Dom and Viggo had a beer and observed Jamie Oliver make a leg of lamb.
"Do you think Elijah likes mint stuffing?" Dom speculated.
Viggo gave Dom a knowing look and a grin.
It was Bean who gave Dom the idea.
"The secret to seduction," Bean gazed down his big nose at Dom. "Is a nice meal. Why don't you try seafood, they have aphrodisiac qualities."
When all was ready, Dom invited Elijah over to his flat for an intimate dinner.
"I don't know," Elijah said. "Dom's a bit creepy. He looks at me with hungry eyes."
Everyone laughed at Elijah's innocence.
"No really," Elijah insisted. "Dom might eat me."
"That, Lij, is exactly the point," Viggo and Orlando and Bean chuckled.
Viggo made a vulgar face with his mouth.
Bean jerked his fist meaningfully.
Orlando pushed Elijah out the door.
Elijah went to Dom's and Dom was waiting.
Dom had been expecting Elijah.
There were candles and cutlery.
Elijah sat down in front of the dinner table. A scowl on his face.
Dom gave Elijah a hot towel to wipe his hands.
Elijah smoked to calm his nerves.
Dom prepared the side dishes.
Dom gets a whiff of Elijah's fags. Elijah was chain smoking like a chimney. Dom was sure Elijah was salty and smoky and carcinogenic to taste.
Dom served Elijah seafood.
Oysters plump and wriggling in their shells. Salmon roe piled on bleeding tuna. Clams raw and red. Mackerels with heads and intact eyes. Garnished with lemons.
Elijah blanched.
"You are what you eat," Dom explained. "You'll be fat as an oyster, tender as salmon, shiny as tuna, hard as a clam and pretty as a mackerel."
"I don't care. I won't eat any of these," Elijah takes up his fag. "It's utterly gross, no offense."
"Prawn cocktail?" Dom proffered.
Elijah ashed his cigarette in it.
The prawn cocktail like a juicy green tiger prawn in it. Sat on a bed of salmon mousse. Stacked over the marrow of coral and dressed with the bile of monk fish. Dom had even put a slice of cucumber impaled on a swordfish's mouth, as decoration.
"Sushi is an art form," muttered Dom darkly.
"What's so great about being chopped into pieces and eaten with wasabi?" Elijah retorted.
Dom raised his knife.
When the police found Dom, all the soy sauce was already used up.
The end.
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Um.
Bwahaha.
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Needs a quick beta but aside from that, that was creepy, hilarious and wonderfully original.
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