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fellowshippers2005-09-12 01:47 pm
mouse-mistress.livejournal.com) wrote in fellowshippers2005-09-12 01:47 pm
My first Vig/Orli fic...
Title: It's All Coming Back to Me Now (1/3?)
Author: Edgespet
Pairing: Viggo/Orlando
Rating: Probably R-ish, for language
Warning: None, really. A wee bit angstier (more angsty??) than my usual, but that will change soon enough, no doubt.
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, completely untrue
Feedback: Begging on hands and knees here!! This is the first Vig/Orli fic I've written & it's also not been betaed, so I would love to get some helpful comments or suggestions!!
A/N: Based on the utterly breath-taking song of the same name by Celine Dion. If you haven't heard it, it's well worth looking up and listening to. Unfortunately, I am a complete idiot & have no idea how to post a link to it here. Lyrics used are in italics. Also based on the assumption that Viggo and Orlando had a fairly serious affair during filming, but Viggo wants to break it off in order not to hurt Orli's career.
It's All Coming Back to Me Now
~New Zealand December 2003 --following ROTK premiere~
~...and whenever you tried to hurt me I just hurt you even worse and so much deeper...~
"God damn it, Orlando! Can't you see that I just want what's best for ...?"
"Don't say it, Vig. Just don't even fucking say it. That's nothing but a bullshit excuse and you know it and if you can sit there and use that line on me, then you're not the man I thought you were ... the man who promised he would love me forever, who would never let me go no matter what ..." Orlando's voice cracked as he spoke and the sound went straight to Viggo's heart.
"Please, Orli ... please try to understand."
"Understand?! What I understand, Viggo, is that you're a liar and a coward!" Tears were streaming down Orlando's cheeks unchecked now, caused by both anger and a shattered heart. "A liar and a coward...and I don't have room in my life for either one!" He turned and ran out the door, slamming it hard behind him.
~Present Day~
~Thought you were history with the slamming of the door
and I made myself so strong again somehow...~
And so it had ended. That was the last time Orlando had seen Viggo and the memory of that night still haunted him. Seeing everything he had ever wanted in his life suddenly crumbling away into nothing, seeing the pain written so clearly on Viggo's face - pain caused by his own hurtful words. Orlando had spent the last two years refusing to even think about his time with Viggo in New Zealand. It simply hurt too much. He had been so sure that Viggo was the one. He had fallen head over heels for the older man as soon as he met him and couldn't believe his luck when he found out that his feelings were returned with equal intensity. Of course he cherished his memories of Viggo - no one had ever made him feel as loved and needed and wanted as Viggo had. He hoarded them away, praying that one day he would be able to think about Viggo without feeling the inevitable sting of tears in his eyes. But right now, all he could do was bury them deep down and carry on with his life.
Orlando lay in his plush bed thinking. Yes, he had carried on with his life. He had moved on. The last two years had been good to him, there was no denying that. A string of successful movies with some of the biggest names in the business, an on-gain, off-again romance with one of the world's most beautiful women ... he certainly had nothing to complain about. Yet none of it seemed able to melt the cold ache in his heart. After every successful premiere he couldn't help thinking how much better it would have been if Viggo had been there by his side. Every time he and Kate had argued, he knew that it wouldn't have been that way with Viggo. In fact, it was his last fight with Kate that had him laying in bed right now, dredging up memories that were better left alone. "I'm not Viggo, Orli. I can't be what you want. It's him you're in love with, not me. Do us both a favor and call him. Then leave me the hell alone!" Of course he had tried to deny it, but really, what was the point? Kate was a sharp girl, far sharper than most people gave her credit for. And, unfortunately, she was right.
Of course, Kate wasn't the first one to urge Orlando to call Viggo. Sean had practically resorted to harassment trying to get him to make the call. Orlando couldn't even count how many times he had heard Sean say, "Give him a chance, lad. He still loves you." Those same words, with minor variations, had also been heard from Dominic, Elijah, Billy, Karl, Ian, hell, even Eric had jumped on the bandwagon for a while - no doubt encouraged by Beanie. But Orlando had held firm. Every time he had considered actually making the call, his mind travelled back to their last night together and his bitter final words to the man he loved - angry words spoken to hurt and wound, to make his lover feel the same pain that was tearing through his own heart. How could Viggo ever forgive him for that? And then he had just walked out and slammed the door behind him. In spite of his angry accusations, he was the one who had run. He was the coward, not Viggo. He was the one who refused to stay and try to work things out. And now, two years later, he was still a coward. Afraid that Viggo was still angry with him, afraid that he had moved on to a new love, afraid that if he heard Viggo's voice just once it would tear down all the walls he had so carefully built and his heart would be crushed beneath the rubble.
Orlando sighed heavily and rolled over, wiping the tears from his eyes before burying his head under his pillow. He resolutely shoved his memories back down into the darkest corner of his mind, refusing to dwell on them any longer. Viggo was lost to him forever and no amount of wishing or pining was going to change that.
Author: Edgespet
Pairing: Viggo/Orlando
Rating: Probably R-ish, for language
Warning: None, really. A wee bit angstier (more angsty??) than my usual, but that will change soon enough, no doubt.
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, completely untrue
Feedback: Begging on hands and knees here!! This is the first Vig/Orli fic I've written & it's also not been betaed, so I would love to get some helpful comments or suggestions!!
A/N: Based on the utterly breath-taking song of the same name by Celine Dion. If you haven't heard it, it's well worth looking up and listening to. Unfortunately, I am a complete idiot & have no idea how to post a link to it here. Lyrics used are in italics. Also based on the assumption that Viggo and Orlando had a fairly serious affair during filming, but Viggo wants to break it off in order not to hurt Orli's career.
It's All Coming Back to Me Now
~New Zealand December 2003 --following ROTK premiere~
~...and whenever you tried to hurt me I just hurt you even worse and so much deeper...~
"God damn it, Orlando! Can't you see that I just want what's best for ...?"
"Don't say it, Vig. Just don't even fucking say it. That's nothing but a bullshit excuse and you know it and if you can sit there and use that line on me, then you're not the man I thought you were ... the man who promised he would love me forever, who would never let me go no matter what ..." Orlando's voice cracked as he spoke and the sound went straight to Viggo's heart.
"Please, Orli ... please try to understand."
"Understand?! What I understand, Viggo, is that you're a liar and a coward!" Tears were streaming down Orlando's cheeks unchecked now, caused by both anger and a shattered heart. "A liar and a coward...and I don't have room in my life for either one!" He turned and ran out the door, slamming it hard behind him.
~Present Day~
~Thought you were history with the slamming of the door
and I made myself so strong again somehow...~
And so it had ended. That was the last time Orlando had seen Viggo and the memory of that night still haunted him. Seeing everything he had ever wanted in his life suddenly crumbling away into nothing, seeing the pain written so clearly on Viggo's face - pain caused by his own hurtful words. Orlando had spent the last two years refusing to even think about his time with Viggo in New Zealand. It simply hurt too much. He had been so sure that Viggo was the one. He had fallen head over heels for the older man as soon as he met him and couldn't believe his luck when he found out that his feelings were returned with equal intensity. Of course he cherished his memories of Viggo - no one had ever made him feel as loved and needed and wanted as Viggo had. He hoarded them away, praying that one day he would be able to think about Viggo without feeling the inevitable sting of tears in his eyes. But right now, all he could do was bury them deep down and carry on with his life.
Orlando lay in his plush bed thinking. Yes, he had carried on with his life. He had moved on. The last two years had been good to him, there was no denying that. A string of successful movies with some of the biggest names in the business, an on-gain, off-again romance with one of the world's most beautiful women ... he certainly had nothing to complain about. Yet none of it seemed able to melt the cold ache in his heart. After every successful premiere he couldn't help thinking how much better it would have been if Viggo had been there by his side. Every time he and Kate had argued, he knew that it wouldn't have been that way with Viggo. In fact, it was his last fight with Kate that had him laying in bed right now, dredging up memories that were better left alone. "I'm not Viggo, Orli. I can't be what you want. It's him you're in love with, not me. Do us both a favor and call him. Then leave me the hell alone!" Of course he had tried to deny it, but really, what was the point? Kate was a sharp girl, far sharper than most people gave her credit for. And, unfortunately, she was right.
Of course, Kate wasn't the first one to urge Orlando to call Viggo. Sean had practically resorted to harassment trying to get him to make the call. Orlando couldn't even count how many times he had heard Sean say, "Give him a chance, lad. He still loves you." Those same words, with minor variations, had also been heard from Dominic, Elijah, Billy, Karl, Ian, hell, even Eric had jumped on the bandwagon for a while - no doubt encouraged by Beanie. But Orlando had held firm. Every time he had considered actually making the call, his mind travelled back to their last night together and his bitter final words to the man he loved - angry words spoken to hurt and wound, to make his lover feel the same pain that was tearing through his own heart. How could Viggo ever forgive him for that? And then he had just walked out and slammed the door behind him. In spite of his angry accusations, he was the one who had run. He was the coward, not Viggo. He was the one who refused to stay and try to work things out. And now, two years later, he was still a coward. Afraid that Viggo was still angry with him, afraid that he had moved on to a new love, afraid that if he heard Viggo's voice just once it would tear down all the walls he had so carefully built and his heart would be crushed beneath the rubble.
Orlando sighed heavily and rolled over, wiping the tears from his eyes before burying his head under his pillow. He resolutely shoved his memories back down into the darkest corner of his mind, refusing to dwell on them any longer. Viggo was lost to him forever and no amount of wishing or pining was going to change that.