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fellowshippers2004-08-31 11:27 pm
elfellon111.livejournal.com) wrote in fellowshippers2004-08-31 11:27 pm
Meet Confusion - 6
Right, as promised - chapter 6. You know the drill by now, so I won't bother too much with formalities. This one is a particular favourite of mine. I hope you enjoy it, and my apologies to all of you who claim they are going through withdrawals. Have fun!
Title: Meet Confusion
Author: Elfellon111
Rating: NC-17, no doubt.
Pairing: EW/DM
Summary: You like smut? Stick around...
Feedback: Would be fantastic, as always.
Disclaimer: I tell you lies, each and everytime you choose to read my fics. As the word already says: this is f.i.c.t.i.o.n.! I make no money of this and the pretty boys are not mine. *sigh*
This will be x-posted at DomLijah Lovers and my own Journal
CHAPTER 6
But it does stop.
Still sorting out who he is and what the fuck happened just now, Elijah is coming off his high with some effort. “Help me, Lij,” Dom’s whispered request pierces his foggy brain. He feels Dom reaching across the bed and then a cool bottle is being pressed into the hand that is resting limply on his chest.
Right, move Lij, wake up, get your goddamn act together, this is you, planet Earth, LA, Dom’s big bed, Dom’s fucking body. He groans.
Lij opens his eyes and looks at Dom who is holding him close and grinning at him. “That good, huh?” he asks, when he realises with some pride that Elijah is actually struggling to return from wherever oblivion had taken him. Lij merely nods, clutching the bottle tightly, as if feeling it in his hand is the only thing that helps him to resurface.
“You kept coming, man,” Dom offers, still close to his ear. “Made me jealous.”
Elijah sits up a bit further, looks into Dom’s eyes, and sees unchecked want still burning steadily there. The familiar grey storm finally snaps him into action and he manages to utter a few hasty apologies before unscrewing the cap. “Come here,” he says, steadying his shallow breathing. “I’ll get you nice and slick.”
Smiling, Dom straddles Lij’s hips, and watches Elijah’s small hand filling up with a generous amount of the cold liquid. He puts the bottle down and presses his hands together, lube squirting between his fingers, easing it, warming it. He lies back down again and slowly puts his hands on Dom’s erect cock, moving them up and down a couple of times, slow and teasing. Dom moans, causing Lij to stop abruptly. “No more for now,” he grins. “Don’t think you’d last.” Dom chuckles and kisses Lij deeply. Elijah eagerly opens his mouth, allows Dom’s tongue to invade and swirl wetly against and around his own.
“Move,” Lij commands, as he reluctantly pulls away from their intense kiss. Without any questions, Dom moves to kneel between Lij’s legs. He slowly places his hands on both knees and spreads them, looking at Elijah expectantly.
“You or me?” Elijah’s blue eyes are blazing. A seductive smile always plays around his lips whenever he asks that fucking fantastic question. Dom looks at him, amazed. The air they breathe is electric, crackling with their desire, their scent, their heat. “You are so beautiful,” he murmurs, sliding his hands down the insides of Elijah’s thighs. “You or me, Dom?” Lij repeats, snapping Dom back to attention.
“You,” Dom hisses between his teeth. “Fucking do it to yourself.” Lij sits up slightly again, propping up on one arm, aiming the other towards that fantastic place just behind his balls. He lingers, touches and squeezes the globes gently with his shiny, slick fingers. He feels Dom’s eyes fixed on the hand that is lazily caressing his balls. He shudders as he touches himself, still aching from the heavy release of minutes before. Then he decides to move on, reach further, forcing himself to ignore Dom’s uninhibited stares and erratic breathing. Lij knows what his display does to Dom, but… no.
No. Move on. He bends his body a bit more, throws his head back and stifles a loud groan when he pushes two fingers into himself.
“God, Lij, look at you,” Dom’s breath hitches and, never taking his eyes off Elijah’s moving fingers, cannot help but reach for his own neglected cock.
“Don’t even dream of touching yourself, Monaghan,” comes a harsh warning, and, startled, Dom meets the blue gaze which is brandishing him mercilessly. Fuck that. Dom feels Lij’s power, regardless of the fact that he’s down on his back, slicking his own fingers in and out of his hole, shamelessly displaying the supposed opposite. Dom shudders when he realises that, ultimately, he is going to submit to this man…
Fuck that, he never considered himself to be submissive. Yet here he finds himself deliberately raising his offending hand, showing that it is empty and far removed from his painful cock, and would Elijah please – please - continue touching himself.
Elijah closes his eyes and his head falls back once again, and Dom almost gulps as he stares from Lij’s flushed face to his rapidly moving chest, his spread legs, and the small, pale hand that is so effectively preparing himself. He desperately struggles not to reach for his cock a second time, groaning in frustration.
After what seems like an age to Dom, Lij stops abruptly and they look at each other. Again, there is that flicker between the two of them, that almost telepathic understanding of request and reply, and Dom takes hold of Lij’s legs, pulling them up, positioning himself. Lij quickly slicks his glistening hand over Dom’s cock once more and then he lies back, breathlessly anticipating invasion.
Elijah opens his eyes to find Dom’s securely locked onto his. “You okay?” he whispers. Lij considers the question in the blink of an eye. His knees draped around Dom’s shoulders, the feel of Dom’s balls pushing slightly against his buttocks, his own cock returning from its state of slumber, uncontrolled breathing, fistfulls of sweaty sheets… Yeah, he is okay.
He nods. Dom grins. He slides out gently and then determinedly pushes in again, causing the initial painful friction to which Lij frantically tries to adjust. As soon as the uneasiness wanes Elijah starts watching Dom’s cock intently as it audibly slides in and out of his own body, and he is hit by the delirious obscenity of it. He looks at Dom’s face and the grey storm in his eyes takes his breath away. He involuntarily reaches out and touches Dom’s cheek and they stare at each other.
Two pairs of eyes anchoring each other in a wild sea of moving limbs, its waves high with impending release, ready to thunder and crash onto a coast of breathless bliss.
Dom seriously picks up the pace and Elijah has to break the stare. It’s too much, it’s too intimate, too close. So he shuts his eyes guiltily and drifts off into the velvety folds of his own oblivion all over again.
As soon as Dom starts slamming into Lij’s body roughly, over and over again, the world starts spinning, and Elijah starts his chant. Dom grips Lij’s slender hips, his fingers and thumbs pressing harshly into the soft skin, and with each thrust he pulls Elijah’s body even closer onto his straining cock.
“Open your eyes, baby,” Dom groans. “I want to see those fucking gorgeous eyes of yours.” But whereas the chant grows louder and louder, and Dom finally has to give up the ability of thought, his dazed brain briefly registers that Elijah’s hand reaches out to firmly stroke and jerk himself to completion, but he never once opens his eyes.
And then Dom shuts down completely. One final deep thrust and he uncoils, gritting his teeth, calling Elijah’s name over and over again. He collapses on top of Lij’s chest while his orgasm thunders through him, and everything he has to give is buried deep inside Elijah’s shuddering body.
Dom eventually remembers how to breathe and tries to teach it to the lost boy in his arms while the last tremors subside and the world comes into focus again. Elijah dares to take on the world once more and opens his eyes. He looks into Dom’s and knows exacly what he sees there.
It’s not in *his* eyes, that much he knows. He still has Confusion, rearing its ugly head immediately. But it takes some effort, and Confusion is fighting with that thing in Dom’s eyes. Elijah knows it’s happening and it scares the shit out of him. Yet, he can do nothing but accept the chaos in his brain, because he is too damn exhausted to fight it.
He tries to ignore Confusion and loose himself in that beautiful thing in Dom’s eyes, but ultimately, when even that becomes too much of an effort, he shuts the world out and surrenders to a dreamless sleep.
* * *
The rain is still ticking against the window in Dom’s bedroom when he wakes up very early the next morning. He mutters something nasty under his breath involving Manchester in winter before he decides to open his eyes. He notices Elijah to his right, sound asleep, curled up in a ball, except for one arm dangling off the side of the bed.
Dom shifts to lie on his back and smiles inwardly, thinking of yesterday’s events. There is a lot of shit to sort out yet, but Confusion is not as strong as it was before. Dom realises with a start that he saw moments yesterday when his comfort, his jar of glue, was nowhere in sight. Dom recognises the symptoms. Elijah is going to have confrontations with Confusion now that will be more painful to face and even harder to win. From now on, Elijah’s growing ability to ignore Confusion, or, even better, punch it squarely in the face, will come with proportionally intense struggles. But it’s a good thing and Dom smiles some more. “Not so long now,” Dom whispers quietly under his breath, turning his head sideways.
He looks at Elijah. They fell asleep plastered against each other, just a few hours ago, and Dom’s body still glows remembering the feel of Elijah’s lithe body covered in all that smooth skin touching him.
Sometime during the night, however, they always drift apart in the big bed. Elijah is like a small furnace at night, he unconsciously goes in search of cool sheets and stretches limbs out of the bed to radiate the heat. Dom smiles again and scoots closer towards Elijah, who is still so blissfully unaware of the waking world. Dom folds his body against him and, while nestling his nose comfortably in the sweet scent of Lij’s neck, he marvels at the perfect, tight fit. He slides his right arm protectively around Lij’s waist and locks his hand safely across the smooth, hairless chest. He breathes deeply, and falls asleep within minutes.
* * *
Coffee. Not the first thing Dom is interested in in the morning, but it wakes him up all the same. Of course, Elijah’s left the bed, no doubt responsible for this smell of coffee in his house. He dons a pair of boxers and crosses the hall to the kitchen, where he finds Elijah sitting at the kitchen table, fully dressed, mug of coffee in one hand, fresh cigarette in the other. Horrible, horrible habit…
He whips his head around when he hears Dom enter, his thoughts disturbed, and stares at him standing there in the doorframe, barely dressed, halfsmile around his lips. Lij puts his mug on the table and they continue watching each other.
Time truly stops for a while. At last, Elijah stubs out his cigarette –another saucer - and gets up. He walks over to where Dom is standing and they come face to face. So close. Dom’s heart sinks a bit when he suddenly realises that Elijah has already been talking to his reflection in the mirror. He’s obviously gathering courage.
“I know what you’re doing, Dom,” Elijah whispers and traces one tentative finger across Dom’s bare chest. He watches his own hand for a while. “You are so beautiful and I treat you like shit…” Dom’s never heard Elijah call him beautiful before and he just has to touch him, make sure it’s real, so he carefully closes his fingers around Lij’s wrist and stills his hand. “You don’t treat me like shit, Lij,” he says softly. “I would have told you.” A sad smile. Silence.
“I only take from you, Dommie. I take and I’m not giving anything in return.” He’s barely audible. Dom raises Elijah’s hand to his mouth and softly kisses the tips of his fingers. “I’m not giving you anything to hold on to, no plan, no future, not even a shallow promise… I feel like I am going in circles, never able to face my fears, always in search of ways to hide from them.” He swallows and his too bright eyes fill up. “I smoke and I drink and I fuck to forget, Dommie,” he whispers. “And I’m using you for that.” His voice catches and he swallows again, harder this time.
“You are my friend. You care for me. Somehow you never tire of dragging me out of this or that gutter I always seem to end up in these days. You talk to me and you allow me to ramble on and on about insignificant people whom I pretend matter to me. I know I hurt you every time I do this, and last night was no exception.”
Two tears have slipped out of the corners of his blue eyes, and Dom gently brushes them away with both hands. “The thruth is,” Lij stumbles on. “No matter what I do or how I feel, I always end up knowing you are the only one who really matters to me. You are my best friend, you take me for who I am, never do I have to act around you, and I am so ashamed of myself when I realise what I am doing to you.”
For the first time during his confession he looks Dom straight in the eyes. “So I have decided that the hurting has to stop. I will stop using you, and stop hurting you. Because I know that is what I do to you. And it makes me so sick.”
He turns around and picks up his coat from the back of the chair, grabbing his new packet of cigarettes and lighter from the table. Dom springs into action, barring Lij’s exit from the kitchen. “Don’t go, Lij,” he places both hands on Elijah’s arms and holds him. There’s no resistance.
“I want you to stay – and I want for us to talk. I guess you’re right when you say the hurting has to stop, but your hurting has to stop too.” He embraces Elijah and some of the sadness ebbs away. “Stay,” he whispers against the dark curls. “We’ll face your fears together.”
TBC
Title: Meet Confusion
Author: Elfellon111
Rating: NC-17, no doubt.
Pairing: EW/DM
Summary: You like smut? Stick around...
Feedback: Would be fantastic, as always.
Disclaimer: I tell you lies, each and everytime you choose to read my fics. As the word already says: this is f.i.c.t.i.o.n.! I make no money of this and the pretty boys are not mine. *sigh*
This will be x-posted at DomLijah Lovers and my own Journal
CHAPTER 6
But it does stop.
Still sorting out who he is and what the fuck happened just now, Elijah is coming off his high with some effort. “Help me, Lij,” Dom’s whispered request pierces his foggy brain. He feels Dom reaching across the bed and then a cool bottle is being pressed into the hand that is resting limply on his chest.
Right, move Lij, wake up, get your goddamn act together, this is you, planet Earth, LA, Dom’s big bed, Dom’s fucking body. He groans.
Lij opens his eyes and looks at Dom who is holding him close and grinning at him. “That good, huh?” he asks, when he realises with some pride that Elijah is actually struggling to return from wherever oblivion had taken him. Lij merely nods, clutching the bottle tightly, as if feeling it in his hand is the only thing that helps him to resurface.
“You kept coming, man,” Dom offers, still close to his ear. “Made me jealous.”
Elijah sits up a bit further, looks into Dom’s eyes, and sees unchecked want still burning steadily there. The familiar grey storm finally snaps him into action and he manages to utter a few hasty apologies before unscrewing the cap. “Come here,” he says, steadying his shallow breathing. “I’ll get you nice and slick.”
Smiling, Dom straddles Lij’s hips, and watches Elijah’s small hand filling up with a generous amount of the cold liquid. He puts the bottle down and presses his hands together, lube squirting between his fingers, easing it, warming it. He lies back down again and slowly puts his hands on Dom’s erect cock, moving them up and down a couple of times, slow and teasing. Dom moans, causing Lij to stop abruptly. “No more for now,” he grins. “Don’t think you’d last.” Dom chuckles and kisses Lij deeply. Elijah eagerly opens his mouth, allows Dom’s tongue to invade and swirl wetly against and around his own.
“Move,” Lij commands, as he reluctantly pulls away from their intense kiss. Without any questions, Dom moves to kneel between Lij’s legs. He slowly places his hands on both knees and spreads them, looking at Elijah expectantly.
“You or me?” Elijah’s blue eyes are blazing. A seductive smile always plays around his lips whenever he asks that fucking fantastic question. Dom looks at him, amazed. The air they breathe is electric, crackling with their desire, their scent, their heat. “You are so beautiful,” he murmurs, sliding his hands down the insides of Elijah’s thighs. “You or me, Dom?” Lij repeats, snapping Dom back to attention.
“You,” Dom hisses between his teeth. “Fucking do it to yourself.” Lij sits up slightly again, propping up on one arm, aiming the other towards that fantastic place just behind his balls. He lingers, touches and squeezes the globes gently with his shiny, slick fingers. He feels Dom’s eyes fixed on the hand that is lazily caressing his balls. He shudders as he touches himself, still aching from the heavy release of minutes before. Then he decides to move on, reach further, forcing himself to ignore Dom’s uninhibited stares and erratic breathing. Lij knows what his display does to Dom, but… no.
No. Move on. He bends his body a bit more, throws his head back and stifles a loud groan when he pushes two fingers into himself.
“God, Lij, look at you,” Dom’s breath hitches and, never taking his eyes off Elijah’s moving fingers, cannot help but reach for his own neglected cock.
“Don’t even dream of touching yourself, Monaghan,” comes a harsh warning, and, startled, Dom meets the blue gaze which is brandishing him mercilessly. Fuck that. Dom feels Lij’s power, regardless of the fact that he’s down on his back, slicking his own fingers in and out of his hole, shamelessly displaying the supposed opposite. Dom shudders when he realises that, ultimately, he is going to submit to this man…
Fuck that, he never considered himself to be submissive. Yet here he finds himself deliberately raising his offending hand, showing that it is empty and far removed from his painful cock, and would Elijah please – please - continue touching himself.
Elijah closes his eyes and his head falls back once again, and Dom almost gulps as he stares from Lij’s flushed face to his rapidly moving chest, his spread legs, and the small, pale hand that is so effectively preparing himself. He desperately struggles not to reach for his cock a second time, groaning in frustration.
After what seems like an age to Dom, Lij stops abruptly and they look at each other. Again, there is that flicker between the two of them, that almost telepathic understanding of request and reply, and Dom takes hold of Lij’s legs, pulling them up, positioning himself. Lij quickly slicks his glistening hand over Dom’s cock once more and then he lies back, breathlessly anticipating invasion.
Elijah opens his eyes to find Dom’s securely locked onto his. “You okay?” he whispers. Lij considers the question in the blink of an eye. His knees draped around Dom’s shoulders, the feel of Dom’s balls pushing slightly against his buttocks, his own cock returning from its state of slumber, uncontrolled breathing, fistfulls of sweaty sheets… Yeah, he is okay.
He nods. Dom grins. He slides out gently and then determinedly pushes in again, causing the initial painful friction to which Lij frantically tries to adjust. As soon as the uneasiness wanes Elijah starts watching Dom’s cock intently as it audibly slides in and out of his own body, and he is hit by the delirious obscenity of it. He looks at Dom’s face and the grey storm in his eyes takes his breath away. He involuntarily reaches out and touches Dom’s cheek and they stare at each other.
Two pairs of eyes anchoring each other in a wild sea of moving limbs, its waves high with impending release, ready to thunder and crash onto a coast of breathless bliss.
Dom seriously picks up the pace and Elijah has to break the stare. It’s too much, it’s too intimate, too close. So he shuts his eyes guiltily and drifts off into the velvety folds of his own oblivion all over again.
As soon as Dom starts slamming into Lij’s body roughly, over and over again, the world starts spinning, and Elijah starts his chant. Dom grips Lij’s slender hips, his fingers and thumbs pressing harshly into the soft skin, and with each thrust he pulls Elijah’s body even closer onto his straining cock.
“Open your eyes, baby,” Dom groans. “I want to see those fucking gorgeous eyes of yours.” But whereas the chant grows louder and louder, and Dom finally has to give up the ability of thought, his dazed brain briefly registers that Elijah’s hand reaches out to firmly stroke and jerk himself to completion, but he never once opens his eyes.
And then Dom shuts down completely. One final deep thrust and he uncoils, gritting his teeth, calling Elijah’s name over and over again. He collapses on top of Lij’s chest while his orgasm thunders through him, and everything he has to give is buried deep inside Elijah’s shuddering body.
Dom eventually remembers how to breathe and tries to teach it to the lost boy in his arms while the last tremors subside and the world comes into focus again. Elijah dares to take on the world once more and opens his eyes. He looks into Dom’s and knows exacly what he sees there.
It’s not in *his* eyes, that much he knows. He still has Confusion, rearing its ugly head immediately. But it takes some effort, and Confusion is fighting with that thing in Dom’s eyes. Elijah knows it’s happening and it scares the shit out of him. Yet, he can do nothing but accept the chaos in his brain, because he is too damn exhausted to fight it.
He tries to ignore Confusion and loose himself in that beautiful thing in Dom’s eyes, but ultimately, when even that becomes too much of an effort, he shuts the world out and surrenders to a dreamless sleep.
* * *
The rain is still ticking against the window in Dom’s bedroom when he wakes up very early the next morning. He mutters something nasty under his breath involving Manchester in winter before he decides to open his eyes. He notices Elijah to his right, sound asleep, curled up in a ball, except for one arm dangling off the side of the bed.
Dom shifts to lie on his back and smiles inwardly, thinking of yesterday’s events. There is a lot of shit to sort out yet, but Confusion is not as strong as it was before. Dom realises with a start that he saw moments yesterday when his comfort, his jar of glue, was nowhere in sight. Dom recognises the symptoms. Elijah is going to have confrontations with Confusion now that will be more painful to face and even harder to win. From now on, Elijah’s growing ability to ignore Confusion, or, even better, punch it squarely in the face, will come with proportionally intense struggles. But it’s a good thing and Dom smiles some more. “Not so long now,” Dom whispers quietly under his breath, turning his head sideways.
He looks at Elijah. They fell asleep plastered against each other, just a few hours ago, and Dom’s body still glows remembering the feel of Elijah’s lithe body covered in all that smooth skin touching him.
Sometime during the night, however, they always drift apart in the big bed. Elijah is like a small furnace at night, he unconsciously goes in search of cool sheets and stretches limbs out of the bed to radiate the heat. Dom smiles again and scoots closer towards Elijah, who is still so blissfully unaware of the waking world. Dom folds his body against him and, while nestling his nose comfortably in the sweet scent of Lij’s neck, he marvels at the perfect, tight fit. He slides his right arm protectively around Lij’s waist and locks his hand safely across the smooth, hairless chest. He breathes deeply, and falls asleep within minutes.
* * *
Coffee. Not the first thing Dom is interested in in the morning, but it wakes him up all the same. Of course, Elijah’s left the bed, no doubt responsible for this smell of coffee in his house. He dons a pair of boxers and crosses the hall to the kitchen, where he finds Elijah sitting at the kitchen table, fully dressed, mug of coffee in one hand, fresh cigarette in the other. Horrible, horrible habit…
He whips his head around when he hears Dom enter, his thoughts disturbed, and stares at him standing there in the doorframe, barely dressed, halfsmile around his lips. Lij puts his mug on the table and they continue watching each other.
Time truly stops for a while. At last, Elijah stubs out his cigarette –another saucer - and gets up. He walks over to where Dom is standing and they come face to face. So close. Dom’s heart sinks a bit when he suddenly realises that Elijah has already been talking to his reflection in the mirror. He’s obviously gathering courage.
“I know what you’re doing, Dom,” Elijah whispers and traces one tentative finger across Dom’s bare chest. He watches his own hand for a while. “You are so beautiful and I treat you like shit…” Dom’s never heard Elijah call him beautiful before and he just has to touch him, make sure it’s real, so he carefully closes his fingers around Lij’s wrist and stills his hand. “You don’t treat me like shit, Lij,” he says softly. “I would have told you.” A sad smile. Silence.
“I only take from you, Dommie. I take and I’m not giving anything in return.” He’s barely audible. Dom raises Elijah’s hand to his mouth and softly kisses the tips of his fingers. “I’m not giving you anything to hold on to, no plan, no future, not even a shallow promise… I feel like I am going in circles, never able to face my fears, always in search of ways to hide from them.” He swallows and his too bright eyes fill up. “I smoke and I drink and I fuck to forget, Dommie,” he whispers. “And I’m using you for that.” His voice catches and he swallows again, harder this time.
“You are my friend. You care for me. Somehow you never tire of dragging me out of this or that gutter I always seem to end up in these days. You talk to me and you allow me to ramble on and on about insignificant people whom I pretend matter to me. I know I hurt you every time I do this, and last night was no exception.”
Two tears have slipped out of the corners of his blue eyes, and Dom gently brushes them away with both hands. “The thruth is,” Lij stumbles on. “No matter what I do or how I feel, I always end up knowing you are the only one who really matters to me. You are my best friend, you take me for who I am, never do I have to act around you, and I am so ashamed of myself when I realise what I am doing to you.”
For the first time during his confession he looks Dom straight in the eyes. “So I have decided that the hurting has to stop. I will stop using you, and stop hurting you. Because I know that is what I do to you. And it makes me so sick.”
He turns around and picks up his coat from the back of the chair, grabbing his new packet of cigarettes and lighter from the table. Dom springs into action, barring Lij’s exit from the kitchen. “Don’t go, Lij,” he places both hands on Elijah’s arms and holds him. There’s no resistance.
“I want you to stay – and I want for us to talk. I guess you’re right when you say the hurting has to stop, but your hurting has to stop too.” He embraces Elijah and some of the sadness ebbs away. “Stay,” he whispers against the dark curls. “We’ll face your fears together.”
TBC